Friday, February 26, 2016

the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Today, I see first hand how, and probably why. Language and cultural nuances are so different between different societies, and I cannot believe how I could be so blind to this. I don't know what to say anymore, but there goes another friend. In the long term, this is probably for the better though.

Friday, February 12, 2016

shallow pockets. and other things.

So it's been about 3 weeks since gugu passed away, and the sad feelings are more or less dissipated, and what's left are happy memories. In most ways. I wonder what turned me away from writing as form of therapy, and what made me stop? I can think of no particular thing, but I would like to get some form of writing back. So more writing here, because practice.

So anyway to change the subject abruptly, one day while taking a cab home, my phone fell out from my shallow SAF shorts pockets, and I had to run (full on sprinting, albeit still rather slow, for the first time in years) to retrieve it. Luckily there was a red light, or my expensive coaster would be gone with the cab. So I got my phone back, and while trying to breathe properly, I thought of how shallow pockets, both literally and figuratively, were the cause of many problems in the world. Some problems include stuff falling out of your pants and causing general panic and mayhem when you feel for your wallet and phone, and only feel cloth where your possessions once were. Instead of the money/ezlink card/phone, what you have is air in your hands and a sinking feeling in your heart, not unlike the feeling of dread you had when you had to show your report book with 5 F's to your parents. That helplessness, because the situation is, in your mind at least, FUBAR. (For the uninitiated FUBAR means fucked up beyond all repair.)

Of course, beyond the literal shallow pockets, also come the figurative shallow pockets, also known as having no fucking money. Or just not enough. I don't think I need to elaborate on the societal problems caused by poverty of the general populace. It gets harder to survive, but there are some organisations for some of these people to fall back on. The problem are those that fall through the crack of these organisations, and the people who are just above the line. At this point in time, I should just quote someone from a Youtube comments section who said what I wanted to say, but better:

I believe there are many Davids out there. People who drink a lot but not alcoholics. People who have various reasons to be unhappy but not enough for others to help them. People who are not homeless but still not having a home. People who are sitting on very bottom of the society while still not being outcasts. People who survive and not living, people who have no hope because they lost illusions and dreams. And there is no help for this sort of people. They are not criminals or bad yet their closest ones hate them anyway. Society helping mentally ill, homeless, immigrants and gods know who else but nobody cares or helps people who earn just enough to pay tax, rent and child support, leaving almost nothing for themselves. This society can be fucked up sometimes.

It's true. For the majority of the lower-middle to middle class, people do have to spend most of their income, and basically, every dollar has to go somewhere. There is little to no room for savings, and when something unexpected happens, life is thrown into disarray. But because they make enough, they don't qualify for any form of aid, and organisations look upon their application as if they were frauds. Not that those applications were going to be accepted anyway. But I have to admit, some of this is theoretical, and from my own opinion/experience. I guess I don't like researching about others and talking fact, because that gets in the way of good writing. Who cares about facts anyway huh? I could just put them in the shallow pockets of my SAF shorts and drop them along the way. And I wouldn't even run after the cab to retrieve it.