Logicless Logic

pardon the (pun)ishment.

SM-1? No sweat. Here is where I start telling the truth. So recently, we have been doing the hydraulics operated SM-1 turret, which is small, cramped, unmanouverable, oily, dirty, hazardous and more vile vocabulary used in the description of something small, cramped, unmanouverable, oily, dirty and hazardous. Hooks and knobs gleefully jab one in the ribs, hook onto ones coveralls or trap ones neck in the most uncomfortable positions while the poor man tries to remove some heavy ass component which happens to be blocked by another component. This activity is comparable to hauling a beached blue whale back into the middle of the ocean.

The fun rating from 1-10 of doing an SM-1 turret is a chart breaking -67billion. To put it simply, a person would rather stab himself in the heart with a rusty bayonet and swallow some bullets fired from an M-16.

This is actually a plan by the organisation to kill two birds with one stone. While saving money on the shell of the SM-1, rumoured to be purchased for a measly $1 per tank, it inculcates murderous intent in the otherwise "aiya fight what. Singapore sure lose one" soldiers who happen to be unlucky enough to have to fight a war in such claustrophobic conditions. Once inside, any enemy unlucky enough to meet this soldier, now with a pissed off rating of 67,000(OFF THE CHARTS!) should run and hide.

Actually, there is another bird to be killed. In a figurative way that is. It could be used as a torture device from prisoners of war, once it is rendered unserviceable. It is guaranteed that within 30 minutes inside the suffocating turret, the POW would run into any soldiers bayonet or grab a soldiers rifle and put his neck over the barrel. He would depart the world with a serene smile on his face despite his violent death. Anything is better than SM-1.

And the part about telling the truth, I'm not sure whether that itself can be considered to be true.

justin.

posted by justin @ 7:47 PM