Logicless Logic

a reflection of myself.

i must say it looks pretty good. haha. anyway, i got back some of my midyear results. it wasnt that good, even though i scraped passes for econs and maths in overall. in fact, i got a 28/100 in my maths paper. which is pretty fucked up. and come to think of it, i was rather relieved of scraping these passes. which led me to think about stuff while i was in the shower. i was thinking why i was happy with barely passing? shouldn't i be aiming to get the best results? is it a lack of confidence in my abilities to get good grades? i realised in the PSLE and O Levels, i got the results i was aiming for. on the dot. is this a case of the ability to achieve what i want or the inability to achieve better than what i aimed for? in the o levels case there is the case of the genius but thats another thing altogether.

also, since the passing marks get lower and lower as the level gets higher, my marks get lower and lower with the passing mark, i can safely deduce that the relationship of the passing mark and the level of study is inverse while that of the passing mark and my mark is a direct one. is this because i only aim to pass everytime? so even if i usually get 50 to pass for a subject, i will get 20 if the passing mark gets lowered to 20? i think it is very possible. or maybe its just because the papers get harder. i think there is also some peer pressure not to do well. in a sense that sometimes you may feel that its not nice to get a much better mark than your good friend. in a sense it is also easier to lower your mark to match him rather than him helping him to raise his[which is actually the right thing to do]. seems stupid but i think there are such cases. not in my case but i thought about it anyway la. showering is boring and there is actually time to do stuff like thinking, practising your singing, reflecting[mirror-type] and reflecting[thinking type]. so what i typed was probably thought out in a span of 10-15 minutes, of which 7 min 46.834 secs was spent soaping, shampooing and washing the foam off. which means that my brain turns pretty quick. or does it mean that i have a short attention span? oh well.

ozy showed me a blog where i was supposed to read a post about that dude pwning the teacher in class. i read the 1st one about failure and success and found it really meaningful. one part of it talks about falling harder if you aim higher. maybe thats why i always aim to pass. and maybe thats why if i dont expect to pss, i wont feel so disappointed at a fail. at the same time, it says the more you fail, the more you succeed, which is true if you read how that guy justifies his point of view. but i shant keep quoting that guy. this is my blog. haha.

another huge bunch of indigestable words for you guys to digest. anyway, if by any chance any one of you was thinking what i said in my very first line of this entry was a joke. its not. im serious.=)

justin.

posted by justin @ 9:23 PM