Logicless Logic

for people who understand only. i think.

THE CAI FAN AUNTIE AND ME - a play

INTRODUCTION
the cai fan auntie who hails from china wanted an english name and thus decided to call herself roger. thus she shall be refered to as roger. original language in white. english translation in green. actions in yellow.

[me walking to cai fan stall. enter me and roger.]

roger: lai boy. yao chi cai fan mah?[come here boy. you want to buy mix vege rice?]

me: ok[ok]

[enter rice on big orange plastic plate]

roger: yao jia shen me?[what do you want to add?]

me: er... dou ya[er.. beansprouts]

[enter beansprouts. dumped onto big orange plastic plate together with rice]

roger: hai you ne?[and then?]

me: he bao dan. hai you ji rou.[fried egg. and chicken.]

[enter fried egg and piece of chicken. put onto big orange plastic plate with beansprouts and rice.]

roger hao yao ma?[anything else?]

me[shakes head] : bu yao le.[no thank you.]

roger: yao ling zhi ma? ga li zhi hai shi lu zhi?[want to add sauce? curry sauce or black sauce?]

me: ga li zhi, duo yi dian.[more curry sauce please.]

[enter curry sauce. drizzled with large ladle over rice, beansprouts egg and chicken on big orange plastic plate.]

roger: hao le boy, liang kuai ban.[okay boy, two dollars and fifty cents]

me: ta ma de yao xiu zhe me gui!?!?![his mother one!(direct translation) so expensive!?!?!]

[i hand the auntie two dollars and fifty cents. exit me, big orange plastic plate, rice, beansprouts, fried egg, piece of chicken and curry sauce on big orange plastic plate.]

actually the last line was made up for dramatic effect. i am a nice and polite boy who doesn't curse and swear.

justin.

posted by justin @ 4:59 PM